


Changes

by Shea



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Bullying, Child Abuse, Children, Harm to Children, Headcanon, Noah Awakening, Pain, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2017-09-08
Packaged: 2018-12-25 09:33:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12033135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shea/pseuds/Shea
Summary: Just a small story about my headcanon for Jasdevi and their awakening.





	Changes

“There has never been, nor will there ever be, anything quite so special as the love between a mother and son.”

~~~~~~~~~

The sun beat down hot that fateful day. This wasn’t unusual, considering it was the middle of summer. But it made the young boys sweat and itch. Devit complained as he wiped at his forehead for the umpteenth time. Jasdero just whined a little underneath his breath, the tree they were sitting on offering next to no shade.

“I hate this place.” Devit muttered to his twin. “Can’t wait to leave.”

“How?” Dero asked, tilting his head a little. “Mama won’t let us.”

Devit made a face, his lip curling. “That woman is hardly our mom.” He hissed, his hand on his knee curling into a fist.

Earlier that day, the twins had woken up to the usual; their mother screaming at them to get up and quit being lazy. By the smell enveloping her, she’d already been drinking for a few hours. Which wasn’t new. She hardly slept at night anymore, drinking herself into a stupor instead. Then after smacking her children around for a few hours, she’d eventually pass out in her room. The room Jasdero and Devit were forbidden from ever seeing. Not that they wanted to.

That morning was particularly awful, though. Jasdero had whined a little about his head hurting. So she yelled at him and threatened to cut his hair off again. Devit, ever the protective brother, instead yelled at her and then proceeded to grab Jasdero by the arm, escaping to the outside.

They lived in a small house on the edge of town where few people would see them. They didn’t _look_ any different from the other kids; maybe a little short for their age, but they still had the same peachy skin and normal facial features. Jasdero’s golden hair got a lot of attention by strangers. Locals looked at it with disgust. Devit’s own black hair was overlooked, not that he cared.

“Monsters”, the townspeople referred to them as. Why, they never understood. They were _normal,_ weren’t they? What had they _done?_

“It’s your fault.” Several older people had told them. “You ruined your mother.”

“Your father ran out because of you.”

“Freaks.”

“Awful.”

It was enough to drive any 12-year-old mad. Several times had Devit had to clean up his brother’s tears. More than once did they have to steal food from stores because their own mother refused to give them any.

Devit studied the red apple in his hand. He had intended to eat it, but reminiscing about this shit life had left a bitter taste in his mouth and he knew it wouldn’t taste good anymore. He chucked it as hard as he could into the fields.

“Debi,” Jasdero said softly, his voice muffled from hiding his face in his knees. “Will we be okay?”

Devit made a face. Fuck her. Fuck everyone in this town, for making his brother feel this way. He nodded a little, resting a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “We’ll be okay.” He said, though if he was trying to convince Jasdero or himself, he didn’t know. “I’ll make sure.”

Dero sniffled and Devit knew he was crying again.

Somewhere a while away they could hear children screaming and laughing as they played amongst each other. Stupid kids. Devit hated them. Almost as much as he hated his mother. What right did they have? They didn’t know them… Didn’t know who they were.

“Come on, Jasdero.” Devit said, jumping up to his feet.

Jasdero looked up and then followed his brother. “Home is the other way.” He observed when Devit started running towards the field.

“Shut up. We’re not going home.”

Dero didn’t have time to be confused or ask before he understood. Almost as though Devit’s thoughts were his very own.

The dark-haired twin followed the sounds until he found the group of kids. They didn’t look familiar. They must’ve been from the next town over, coming to play among the tall stalks of corn. Part of Devit wanted to scare them off, chase them away. The other half wanted to… well, _play_ with them for once. Jasdero was fun to play with and all. But the desire to play with _other_ people their age, and play games meant for more than two people, well it was tempting.

He spotted them before they saw him. There were five of them, around ten or twelve years old. They looked like they were playing some version of cops and robbers. One girl screamed as she was being chased before being tackled by one of the boys.

Devit stepped out a little further so the attention was drawn to him, Jasdero standing by his side.

“Who’re you?” One of the boys asked, his eyes squinting at the pair.

“I’m Devit. This is my brother, Jasdero.” Devit introduced, motioning to his twin who waved at the other kids. “We live in the town that way.” He jabbed a thumb over towards their home.

“Daniel,” A girl with pigtails whispered a little too loudly. “We’re not supposed to play with kids from other there.”

“I know.” ‘Daniel’ replied, shrugging her off and looking at them. “What do you want?”

Devit blinked at them and then shrugged. “To play? We don’t get to play often there.”

Jasdero nodded for emphasis. “Never.”

“Well, that sucks.” A different boy shrugged. “But you can’t play with us.”

Devit narrowed his eyes at them. “Well, why not?”

“Because we don’t wanna play with you. My parents said there’s a pair of weird freaks from that place.” He pointed accusingly at their hometown.

Something snapped within Devit and in the next second he knocked the boy down. “We’re not freaks!” He yelled before hitting him in the face. Two girls screamed and Daniel tried to tug the other boy free. Jasdero stood back and let the events unfold. He was just as angry as Devit but couldn’t do much like this.

Devit spat at them as they ran, screaming, back home. “Bastards.” He muttered and grabbed Dero’s hand. “Come on. Let’s go home…”

~~~~~~~

“Where have you been?” Their mother asked as soon as they walked in the door.

“What do you care?” Devit retorted, making his way to their room before they were stopped by her scrawny arm.

“’Cause I’ve been waitin’ all day to give your ass a whoopin’.” She spat and Devit’s nose crinkled at the strong odor of alcohol on her breath.

Devit tugged his arm out of her grasp and frowned at her. “I didn’t do anything. Neither did Dero.”

“Yes you did, you little _monsters._ ” She hissed, grabbing a fistful of both their hair. “You ruined my fucking life. Made my husband leave cause _you_ scared him off.”

“We didn’t do anything!” Devit screamed in her face when she started pulling on his hair. “He prob’bly left ‘cause you’re a bitch!”

That was, evidently, the wrong thing to say. With a growl, she knocked their heads together painfully before practically throwing them into their room. Devit made a grab for his brother, making sure he was okay.

“There wasn’t even supposed to be two of you heathens.” Their mother continued, staring at them with more disgust than usual. “Only one. Only supposed to have _one._ ”

“Nobody plans on having _twins_ you crazy bitch!” Devit snapped at her.

“I only had one child!” She screamed so loudly both boys covered their ears. “One! Then I turn around and there’s _fucking two!_ ”

“That’s impossible!” Devit scoffed at her. “You were probably just too drunk to remember!”

“I wasn’t! Ask anyone!” She pointed a nasty finger at them. “You split into two! Cause you’re both monsters!”

“No we’re not!!” Devit lunged at her legs, successfully knocking her down and started punching anywhere he could reach her. Never before had he ever been _this_ angry. But after 12 years of this… he’d had enough. He kicked and punched ferociously, his anger blinding him. “I hate you! I hate you! I hate all of this! Fuck you!” He screamed.

He didn’t even notice all the blood yet.

When he’d finally calmed down, he realized Jasdero wasn’t there. He looked back into their room and found him on the bed, curled up, like usual, but he looked at Devit with some form of admiration.

“Debi…” He said softly as his brother climbed up to sit beside him. “I think you… killed her.”

Devit blinked and then noticed that she _had_ gone quite silent. Then Dero pointed to the bloody mess he’d made of himself and Devit understood. But… he didn’t feel sad or regret at all.

“Good riddance.” He muttered instead.

“Will we be in trouble?” Dero asked.

Devit hadn’t thought about that. The townspeople would blame them, even if it hadn’t had been them. But could they arrest kids? Maybe they would…. Throw them out on their own? Devit didn’t wait to see.

“Come on.” He grabbed Dero’s hand once again and jumped off the bed. He rummaged through their few belongings until he found a sack. “Let’s go before anyone notices.” He smiles for the first time in a long time as Jasdero. “We’re finally gettin’ out of here.”

~~~~~~~~

They didn’t very far outside the town before they were stopped by weather and rain. There was an empty, abandoned barn they took shelter in. Devit made a large bed out of hay and sighed as he laid down.

“We’re finally free of them…”

Dero nodded, laying down in front of him. “Now what?”

Devit paused, and then shrugged. “Survive, I guess. When we’re older, we can get jobs and make our own money.”

“That sounds like fun…”

Devit smiled again and nodded. “It will be.”

Jasdero fell asleep with a smile on his face; a happy and refreshing sight for Devit. He tried to follow in his brother’s steps, but the events of that day bothered him. Particularly their mother’s words. “You split into two”, she had said. But… how was that even possible? Part of Devit wanted to just believe she was crazy and making stuff up. But a larger part of him somehow knew that, no… she was right. They were _born_ one. While he somehow knew it was true, he still couldn’t come up with the _how,_ or the _why._ They weren’t freaks, or monsters, or demons. He refused to believe _that_ bullshit excuse. There had to be some… science behind it or something. There had to be.

He didn’t realize he’d fallen asleep until he was woken up by Jasdero’s thrashing. The blonde was whining and whimpering, his arms flailing about, but he was still very much asleep.

“Dero?” Devit gave his shoulder a gentle shake, believing he was just having a nightmare.

“Hurts…” Jasdero murmured. “It hurts…”

“What?” Devit blinked, his brow furrowing. “What hurts?”

Jasdero woke up suddenly with a gasp, scaring Devit back on his butt. He hardly had time to realize he’d woken up before he was sobbing. “Debi, my head hurts.” He whimpered between shaking gasps. “Make it stop.”

“I don’t know what to do, Dero.” Devit frowned. Jasdero tossed his head to the side, throwing his long hair away from his face, and Devit squinted. “You’re bleeding.”

Tearing a part of his shirt off, he used it to dab at his brother’ forehead before a splitting pain exploded behind his eyes. He gasped and held his own head.

“D-Debi.” He could hear Jasdero call for him, but only faintly.

What was going on? They were _fine_ the day before! They couldn’t be this sick already… could they?

“Jasdero.” He rasped out, blindly groping for his hand. He found it, and both of them squeezed for dear life on the other’s hand. The pain was so great, Devit wanted to start crying. He could feel the tears, but refused as hard as he could to let them fall. Dero needed him right now. He couldn’t be acting like a little baby because of some pain.

_Noah._

The word circled around in his head. The name was all he could think of. _Noah. Noah. Noah._

What the heck was Noah? Devit didn’t understand. He wanted this to end.

He felt a wet presence on his hands and opened his eyes. Blood. It didn’t take him very long to figure out it was coming from his own forehead, the same place Jasdero was bleeding. Jasdero was still writhing and sobbing and clinging to Devit.

_Noah. Noah._

_Fuck off!_ Devit screamed inside his head. _Leave us alone!_

It seemed like _hours_ as their agony continued. It subsided after a while. The pain was still terrible, but they could at least stop crying for a minute. Devit blinked at his brother and then proceeded to wipe at the blood on his face. Some of it was already dried, most of it still leaking down his face. Dero sniffled and touched Devit’s own forehead.

When Devit cleaned off most of the blood he blinked and gasped a little. The wounds across Dero’s head looked like little crosses, or stars. Or something. Something unnatural, Devit knew. What the fuck was this?

_Noah._

The pain started to grow entirely too soon again. Jasdero crushed Devit in a desperate hug as they both started sobbing. It was strange. It was painful. It was stupid. Devit just wanted to live peacefully with his brother. What was so wrong with that? Why was life treating them like this?

They both started thrashing. The burning, crushing pain spread from their head to their entire body. It felt like someone had lit them on fire from the inside. It was agony. Devit screamed and sobbed alongside Jasdero. His vision swam with the pain. He felt like throwing up. He felt like hell. Was he dying?

Hours passed before this fit finally ended too. Now just scared and still somewhat in pain, the twins clung to each other again and continued to cry.

“My, my.” A new voice said in the darkness, scaring the twins into silence.

“W-Who’s there?” Devit asked, trying to sound threatening but his whimpering voice betrayed him.

In the shadows was a shape of a really fat man. But Devit didn’t feel threatened by him. He felt as though this guy were here to… welcome them? Or at least talk to them. Maybe he would understand…

“Devit. Jasdero.” He spoke and Devit flinched. How the hell did he know them? “Together, you make Jasdevi.”

Devit wanted to ask what the hell he was talking about, but the pain in his head made him grit his teeth. “What’s happening to us?” He asked through his clenched teeth.

“You were born as God’s chosen, the Noah.” The fat man explained.

There it was again. That stupid word.

_Noah._

“W-What-“ Jasdero attempted to speak before whining softly again.

“You were chosen at birth. You carry Noah’s genes within you both.” The man continued. “Representing the _Bonds_ of Noah, you split into two beings.”

The man reached out with both gloved hands, one hand resting on Devit’s head, the other on Jasdero’s. Devit hated being touched by anyone that wasn’t Jasdero, but this… it helped, somehow. His arms tightened around his twin as he stared at the man in front of them.

“What’s happening? What’s Noah?”

“You are waking up. The memories from 7000 years ago is coming to you. You carry the memory of bonds. Your awakening is almost complete.” The man started crying, though he still smiled. Devit felt like crying again. Jasdero was already crying again. “You’ll see everything. You’re already starting to see the world as it truly is, aren’t you?” Devit didn’t say anything but he knew the man knew anyway.

It seemed like hours once again as the pain faded away once again, weaker than before. Like the man had said, Devit started to _know_ the world. The true world. He knew Jasdero knew it too. Or, well, they knew together. Now it made sense, and Devit knew his mother wasn’t lying.

“Tenth disciple, Devit.” The fat man said through his happy tears, his hands still petting the tops of their heads. “Eleventh disciple, Jasdero.”

The twins looked at each other. Their skin had darkened to a grey color, and the bleeding stigmata were now mostly clear and clean. They knew this was their true appearance. Or almost. Close enough.

“Jasdevi,” The man said and both boys responded to the name. Their name. “Welcome home.”


End file.
